Is it through sickness? Mental Illness, Physical Pain? I wonder.

So you all know about my whole situation with my “friend,” right? Well, I am noticing some rather concerning changes within him. As I stated before, he is in his Saturn return, and he’s really going through it. Now he’s having mobility issues. His mental health isn’t well, and he’s very uninterested and aloof when he hangs out with me and our other friend.

Just yesterday, we went out for empanadas, and he was just mentally somewhere else. Our other friend asked if he was ok, and he said Yeah. Then he received a text and immediately turned his phone over, as if we didn’t see how he reacted. It was interesting, to say the least. We then went to a cigar lounge, and he hung out for a bit before leaving, and he was very to himself even then. Once he left, our other friend and I basically had a LONG discussion about him and how he’s been acting.

I personally still think his moods have something to do with that girl he’s dating. If you’re in love or dating someone, no matter what stressors you’re going through, you should still have the wherewithal to persevere. I know he is having issues with his father; he’s broke for the most part, so money may be a contributing factor. Work is stressful, and now his ankle is acting up. I still think he’s scared of me for going off at him in a letter for how he was treating all of us. He’s scared that maybe, just maybe, I was right about everything. If that’s the case, then own up to it, tell me I’m right, and ask me how to fix it and move forward. He’s holding so much of his emotions back that nothing but negative energy spews out when he’s around. It’s such a grand and intoxicating innocence.

I just miss my friend. What type of friendship did we have before he met that girl? I know she keeps bothering him with nonsense, but he doesn’t know how to say stop and let go. Even though I am ranting and discussing on this website, I have moved forward with everything. I barely dream about the pain he caused me within the last several months. He’s a pitiful excuse of a man, and I almost feel sorry for him now, going through his karma. And his girlfriend is a rebound. I wonder if she’s seeing what I see and is trying to escape.

Karma. She’s interesting to me. That’s why I try not to harm people the way I could. No point in doing so, in my opinion. We’re getting ready to go into some retrograde soon, and I have been feeling some weird feelings about the situation for a few weeks now. Something is going to happen, but I plan to keep going and not let it bother me. That’s their Karma, their cross to bear.

Not my circus, not my monkeys, but I can see all of the clowns.